--I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
-- Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
-- Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
-- The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
-- The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
-- To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
-- When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
-- The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
-- A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
-- A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
-- Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking
-- We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.
-- When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.
-- The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.
-- The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
-- The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
-- If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.
-- A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail
